Do you even know you?

“The television was on. It had been on for hours. Years. It was there. TV on demand, a great freedom. Hadn’t Burroughs said there was more freedom today than ever before? Wasn’t that like saying things were more like today than they’ve ever been?”

— Lynne Tillman

The Complete Madame Realism and Other Stories


In lieu of sharing poetry (which feels increasingly difficult to post due to the terrifying stasis of this country) I decided, instead, to try my hand at video design. I have some (very minimal) experience with video production from creating / editing the videos that often accompany my poems. But last night I wanted to try something a little different. 


These images were scoured (for hours) and compiled meticulously to usher in a landscape befitting the gorgeous track that serves as its main inspiration. Entitled “Options”, this song is by the band B o k e h. Musically speaking it’s quite the cerebral and emotional journey.  Hypnotic and sensual at times, rich with heavy mood and careful contemplation. It somehow feels both futuristic and nostalgic, simultaneously.

Thus, I put this video together with an artsy lo-fi, psychedelic, bittersweet pop-art aesthetic. It has glimpses of people, places and things that hold significance  in my heart. Flashes of the inner mazes. Moments of magnetism juxtaposed with solemn realization. 


I truly hope you enjoy, my loves.



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Amor et melle et felle est fecundissimus || Love is rich with both honey and venom

27 thoughts on “Do you even know you?

  1. Oh my goodness, April, that was so perfect! It was so perfectly you! I’m in a strange mood today, with opposing forces pulling me in all directions and this was literally an escape for me. And I didn’t even know that I needed it 😩 I loved all the images and the music and the lyrics and the fact that it is yours. Beautifully done 👏🏻

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yay!!! Larisa I’m so happy you were the first to comment! When I finished this project you and Rob came to mind and I knew I was going to be anxious to hear both of your opinions on it! I’m all tingly-happy that you found it to be a beautiful little escape. Damn those polar forces…. shoo, shoo. And don’t sorry – I stare at your photos too. Probably more than I should. xx

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Hahaha. And to quote Sigmund Freud:

        “Sexuality is the key to the problem of the psychoneuroses and of the neuroses in general. No one who disdains the key will ever be able to unlock the door.” 🗝♟

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Escapism is what I needed. April, the video composition you did is impressively well done and the collages that fit with the music and the emotion and feel is breathtaking.

    You should do more of these…The video also paints how you feel emotionally and poetically. Hope I interpret that correctly. I felt it. You are such a super-creative talent and a super gifted poet. Much respect, April. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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